Clik here to view.
A Guide to Subway Safety
In the last six months, three New Yorkers have died after hopping down onto the subway tracks to retrieve something they dropped. Subways are not funhouse playlands! Are you being unsafe underground?...
View ArticleDon't Choke on Food, Okay?
Doctors want the FDA to label foods that are choking hazards. Hey: Hot dogs kill. More »
View ArticleClik here to view.
Pooping Yourself Dead, and Other Health Secrets
E. coli-infested food! Metal-infested drugs! Fancy-infected doctors! Whooping-infested coughs! Harlem-infested hospitals! And liver-infested poop! It's your lifesaving Health Watch, where we watch...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Your Baby Doesn't Stand a Chance
First they said that strollers are unsafe. Then they said that baby slings are unsafe. Then they said some brands of cribs were unsafe. Now: all the rest of the cribs are unsafe. More »
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Great New York Goose Massacre
Goodbye, geese. New York is planning to "reduce the number" of Canada geese in the state from 250,000 to 85,000. They're not shipping 170,000 geese off to a magical gooseland, though. They're killing...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Central Park Now Dangerous (Except Compared to Rest of City)
Just when you thought it was safe to go to Central Park with a basket of cheese and things like that, whoa, stop. Crime in Central Park is skyrocketing more than anywhere else. Are you in terrible...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Flight Attendant Uses Inflatable Slide for Dramatic Job Walk-Out (Updated)
A JetBlue flight attendant argued with a passenger on the tarmac at JFK today. In a fit of rage, he activated the plane's inflatable emergency slide, slid out, and stormed off the job. [Updated with...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Will Tea Party Members Who Attend Glenn Beck's Rally Survive Washington DC?
Teabaggers will soon descend on Washington for Glenn Beck's "Restoring Honor" rally, taking place at the site of Martin Luther King Jr.'s "Dream" speech, on its anniversary. What precautions should...
View ArticleClik here to view.
There Is Nothing We Can Do to Prevent Drivers from Texting, Killing Themselves
A new study shows that accidents caused by texting drivers actually increases when the activity is prohibited by law. That's because people send text messages, but try to get sneaky about it. We...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Air Traffic Controllers are Making a Lot More Mistakes These Days
Afraid of flying? Well, here are some figures that should make that fear a little worse: Mistakes by air traffic controllers in the past year are up 51%. Don't worry, the FAA says that's because they...
View ArticleClik here to view.
TSA Officer Fired For Cocaine Prank
A TSA memo shows that an officer at the Philadelphia International Airport was fired earlier this year after telling passengers going through a baggage screening that he'd found a vial of white powder...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The NYPD's Never Been Less Likely to Shoot You
NYPD officers last year fired the fewest shots since the department started keeping records in 1971. Also, for the first time, no officer was shot by a suspect. One off-duty cop was shot and killed by...
View ArticleClik here to view.
U.S. Finally Prevents Sale of Obviously Dangerous Crib
The Consumer Product Safety Commission has finally issued an outright ban on drop-side cribs, which have a habit of malfunctioning and trapping infants. Only 32 kids had to die over the last decade!...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Mass Transit Will Never Be Safe (Sorry)
Mass transit will never be safe from terrorism, so it's not worth worrying about. You can't keep bombs off trains, buses, and subways and still expect them to function properly. It's best not to even...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Arianna Huffington's Airplane Foe Speaks: 'She's on Her Blackberry!'
Day three of the Arianna Huffington Unsafe Airplane Blackberry-ing Scandal: in which Ellis Belodoff of Plainview, Long Island recounts how he yelled at the rich lady on her Blackberry, "What is wrong...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Compton, California: Now Less Scary
Today in safe places: Compton, California, where murders are down by more than three-quarters in the past 20 years and old folks have returned to porch-sitting. The "gangster rap causes violence and...
View ArticleClik here to view.
'Aging Pipelines' Will Kill Us All
We will all die eventually, yes, but now we know what will kill us: Aging pipelines! Well, not the pipelines specifically, so much as the explosions that will occur when natural gas leaks from those...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Is It Possible to Make Dangerous Reporting Safe?
Michael Kelly was killed in a Humvee accident in Iraq. Bob Woodruff was blown up by an I.E.D. Damn near every reporter covering the Egyptian revolution was assaulted one way or another, including Lara...
View ArticleClik here to view.
America's 'Expanding Girth' Threatens Vital Transportation Systems
Are you safe while riding a city bus? Ha, *scoffing sounds.* It turns out that your fellow passengers are placing you at risk of more than tuberculosis—risk of the entire bus just, like, falling...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Let Air Traffic Controllers Nap
In the wake of several high-profile incidents where air traffic controllers were caught falling asleep while working, the FAA has decided to change its work rules. But it still won't allow controllers...
View Article
